regression

I hesitate to title this post "regression". Holden's doing great still, esp. with the verbal imitation. He will pretty much at least TRY to say whatever you tell him to. It's clear that it's just not easy for him to get the words out - he will make a sound, and it's also clear that he thinks he's saying what you told him to say.

The reason I titled it regression is because the yeast has returned and he's very spacey, stimmy, and just ... out of it. I haven't seen him this way for a few months, so it's really hard to see. He's been on a 'high' for a few months now, and to watch him slip back into his own world - even though it's much better than before - is just hard. He's been back on the Diflucan for 4 days now. I'm suspecting that he's going through a die-off with the yeast, which usually occurs when you're trying to clear it out.

At the advice of the DAN doctor, we've held off on the 3 challenge tests we're waiting to do. We have everything we need to do them - but yeast can get worse during chelation, so we're giving the Diflucan time to work. It's hard to wait. You know your kid has crazy levels of toxins in his system and you know that you need to get it out, but you have to wait. I'm hoping to do one of the challenge tests on Tuesday. But we'll see how he is tomorrow first.

I told my husband that I feel guilty for complaining or even bringing up the fact that it bothers me to see Holden this way. Because, even at his worst now, he's better than his best about 7 months ago. So, yes, he's making progress. And I'm so thankful for that. But, as we all know, autism is a roller coaster ride and it's hard to go from a 'high' to a 'low' in a matter of days.

So, Happy Anniversary to us today! 3 years of marrige, 6 years of being together. This past year of our marriage has truly been a test for us. We're still here. Still married. And still very much in love. Thank god. I don't know what I would do without my husband and having to go through all of what life has thrown us by myself.

Zoe's taking the FCAT this week. The standardized test for 3rd grade. They've been preparing (or rather, scaring) the kids for a year now. She's nervous, but I know she'll do fine. She's so incredibly smart and intelligent and loving, and I could go on and on and on.

Jackson's 7 months. He's doing fine, developmentally. Holden also did fine at 7 months. But, every month that he's on track is a blessing. We'll continue to watch him and probably have a formal eval at 12 months. That way, if there's anything at all worth looking into, we can start even earlier than we did with Holden. Here's hoping we won't need to.